Friday, 26 November 2004
Chauvinism
Words of witan
If Milli Vanilli falls over in the woods, does somebody else make a sound?
Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.
Why is a delivery on a ship called a "cargo" and a delivery by car a "shipment"?
Most teenagers seem to think that being individual is looking like everyone else.
Writing about music is like dancing about architecture.
If something is adjustable, sooner or later it will need adjusting.
When you point one finger at someone else, you're pointing four at yourself. Think about that when you want to blame someone.
Is it possible to look cool whilst picking up a frisbee?
Under Capitalism, man exploits man. Under Communism, the reverse is true.
Never fall in love with a tennis player...love means nothing to them.
"I am, therefore I think." Isn't that putting Descartes before the horse?
In 1994, Los Angeles Police arrested a man for dressing up as the Grim Reaper – complete with scythe – and standing outside the windows of old peoples' homes and staring in.
Computer games don't affect kids; I mean if Pac-Man affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in darkened rooms, munching magic pills and listening to repetitive electronic music. (Kristian Wilson, Nintendo, Inc., 1989)
If practice makes perfect and nobody's perfect, then why practise?
If you send someone a bag of snow and it melts in the post, they won't get your drift.
Victor Hugo once said, "You can prevent the invasion of armies, but not the invasion of ideas." What he really meant to say was, "You can prevent the invasion of armies, unless you're French."
(Borrowed from "Things We Didnt' Know" on www.iwantoneofthose.com. I'll give them back...honest.)
Thursday, 25 November 2004
Fainting
Silent Shakespeare (1899-1911) - ickleReview (cinema)
Nugget: turn on the projector and the rest is silence.
Tuesday, 23 November 2004
Coffee and Cigarettes (2003) - ickleReview (cinema)
Nugget: "Isn't it funny how when you can't afford something it costs a fortune, but suddenly when you can afford it it's just, like, free?"
Sunday, 21 November 2004
ickleReviews
Update (Tuesday 5 January 2010): I haven't reviewed any films since Brüno (in a vain attempt to streamline my life and get on with my DPhil without unnecessary clutter) but I've still added these films to this list and given them a rating. These are the films without hyperlinks, such as The Boondock Saints.
Update (Monday 11 January 2010): I'm now going to try reviewing films within Twitter's limit of 140 characters, starting with The Road.
ickleRatings explained:
* a must-see: miss this and you're a damn fool
+ pooty good: a fair crack of the whip
= so-so: won't give you rabies, but don't break a leg to see it
- stinks royally: avoid like the plague
A
À bout de souffle +
About Time (DVD) *
The Adjustment Bureau +
Adult Life Skills +
Adventureland +
Afghan Star =
Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa =
Alexander -
Alice +
Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore +
All Good Things =
All This Mayhem +
L'Argent +
Argo +
The Armstrong Lie +
Atonement
Avatar +
Away We Go +
B
The Babadook +
Baby Driver +
Bad Education =
Bananas =
Band of Brothers *
A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood +
Before Midnight *
Before Sunrise *
Before Sunset *
Beginners +
Behind the Candelabra -
Be Kind Rewind -
Belleville Rendez-Vous
Benda Bilili! +
Bend It Like Beckham =
Best Shot (AKA Hoosiers) -
The Bicycle Thieves (AKA Ladri di biciclette) *
Bigger Stronger Faster* +
The Big Short +
Black Hawk Down +
BlacKkKlansman +
Black Orpheus =
Black Panther =
The Blind Side +
Bloom =
Blow Out +
Blow-Up =
Blue Blood +
Blue Jasmine +
The Bodyguard -
Bombshell +
The Book of Life =
Booksmart *
The Boondock Saints =
Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan +
The Bourne Identity +
The Bourne Supremacy +
The Bourne Ultimatum +
Bowling for Columbine +
Boyhood
The Breakfast Club -
Breaking Away +
Breaking the Waves =
Brick +
Bridesmaids =
Bridge of Spies +
Brüno =
A Bug's Life =
Bugsy Malone +
Bullets Over Broadway +
Butterfly on a Wheel =
C
Café Society +
Captain Phillips +
Captain Underpants =
Carnage (cinema) +
Carnage (TV) *
Chelsea on the Rocks =
Chinatown =
Chocolat +
A Christmas Story +
The Circle =
City Slickers -
Closer (cinema) +
Closer (DVD) +
Coffee and Cigarettes =
Cold Mountain =
Collateral +
The Color of Money =
The Commitments *
Contact =
Control Room =
The Conversation =
Cookie's Fortune =
The Cooler =
Coraline =
The Corporation =
Crash (cinema) =
Crash (DVD) +
Crazy Rich Asians =
Crimes and Misdemeanors +
C.S.A.: The Confederate States of America -
The Curse of the Jade Scorpion +
D
Danny Collins =
Day & Night (3D) +
Dazed and Confused *
Dead Poets Society +
Dead Man's Shoes +
Dean Spanley =
The Death of Stalin +
Death Proof +
Deconstructing Harry +
Deep Throat =
Denial =
The Departed =
Derailroaded +
The Descent -
Despicable Me =
Despicable Me 2 =
The Devil's Advocate =
Die Another Day =
Diego Maradona +
DiG! +
Diner +
District 9 +
Django Unchained
Documentary: The Margins of Reality -
Dog Altogether +
Dogville *
Do I Sound Gay?
Donnie Brasco =
Donnie Darko +
Donnie Darko: The Director's Cut +
Dylan Moran: Monster =
E
Eastern Promises =
Easy Riders, Raging Bulls +
Eddie Murphy Raw +
Eddie Izzard: Unrepeatable +
Edge of Seventeen
An Education +
End of the Century: The Story of the Ramones =
An Englishman Abroad =
Enigma -
Enough Said +
Enron: The Smartest Guys in the Room +
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind +
Être et avoir +
Everybody Wants Some!!
Every Little Thing (AKA La Moindre des choses) =
Everyone Says I Love You +
Everything in This Country Must +
Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex* But Were Afraid to Ask =
Exit Through the Gift Shop
F
The Fabelmans +
The Favourite +
Ferris Bueller's Day Off =
Festival Express (cinema) *
Festival Express (DVD) *
50 First Dates =
Fight Club +
Film Stars Don't Die in Liverpool +
5x2 +
500 Days of Summer =
The Five-Year Engagement =
Flags of Our Fathers =
The Florida Project +
Following James Joyce, Dublin to Buffalo +
The Football Factory =
Forgetting Sarah Marshall =
Forrest Gump +
Four Lions +
Four Weddings and a Funeral =
The 40 Year Old Virgin +
Frances Ha +
Frankie and Johnny +
Frankie Boyle Live +
Frankie Howerd on Campus -
Freaky Friday +
Friday Night Lights +
Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe *
Friends with Benefits =
Frost/Nixon +
Funny Cow +
Funny People =
Fury =
G
The Godfather: Part II +
Gonzo: The Life and Work of Dr. Hunter S. Thompson -
Good Bye Lenin! +
Goodfellas +
The Good, the Bad and the Ugly +
The Good Girl =
Good Night, and Good Luck. +
The Good Samaritan -
Good Vibrations +
Good Will Hunting +
A Good Woman -
Googlewhack Adventure +
Gosford Park *
The Grand Budapest Hotel =
Gregory's Girl +
Grosse Pointe Blank =
The Guard =
A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints +
H
Hail, Caesar! +
Hallam Foe +
Handkerchief Drill +
Hannah and Her Sisters +
Happy-Go-Lucky +
Harold and Maude +
Hearts and Minds +
Heat =
The Heat =
Hero =
He's Just Not That Into You -
Hidden (AKA Cache) +
Hillsborough =
Hollywood Ending =
Hostel =
Hot Fuzz =
The House I Live In
House of Flying Daggers =
Hugo (3D) =
The Hunger Games =
The Hunger Games: Catching Fire =
Hunt for the Wilderpeople
The Hurt Locker +
Husbands and Wives =
I
I Am Sam +
Igby Goes Down =
I Heart Huckabees =
The Imitation Game
The Inbetweeners Movie =
The Inbetweeners 2 =
In Bruges +
Inception (cinema) +
Inception (DVD) +
An Inconvenient Truth +
The Incredibles =
Inglourious Basterds +
Ingrid Goes West -
Inside Deep Throat =
Inside Llewyn Davis +
Inside Out *
The Iron Lady +
Irrational Man +
Isle of Dogs =
I, Tonya
It's a Wonderful Life +
J
Jojo Rabbit =
Juno +
Just Mercy +
K
The Kids Are Alright +
The King of Comedy +
The King's Speech =
Kinsey -
Knives Out +
Knocked Up +
Kolja (AKA Kolya) +
L
Lady Bird
Lady Chatterley +
Lars and the Real Girl +
Last Days +
The Last King of Scotland +
The Last of the First =
The Lego Movie =
Le Mans '66 (AKA Ford v Ferrari) +
Letters from Iwo Jima +
Letter to Brezhnev =
Liberal Arts +
Life, Animated +
The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou =
Life in a Day +
Life Is Beautiful (AKA La Vita è bella) +
Like Crazy +
Limitless =
The Lion King =
Little Men
Little Miss Sunshine +
The Lives of Others (AKA Das Leben der Anderen) *
Local Hero =
Locke =
The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner =
Looking for Eric +
Looper -
Loose Change: 2nd Edition =
The Lost City of Z =
Love Actually +
Love and Death =
Love & Mercy +
Love Is Strange +
Love, Simon +
M
McQueen +
The Madness of King George +
Maggie's Plan +
Man on Wire +
March of the Penguins +
The Mark of Cain =
Marley +
Marriage Story +
The Martian +
Mary Poppins =
The Master +
Match Point (cinema) +
Match Point (DVD) +
Mayor of the Sunset Strip =
Mean Girls =
Me and You and Everyone We Know +
Meet the Fockers -
Melinda and Melinda +
Memento *
The Merchant of Venice =
Mesrine: Killer Instinct =
Mesrine: Public Enemy No. 1 =
Micmacs (AKA Micmacs à tire-larigot) +
Midnight in Paris +
Mid90s +
A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy =
Mighty Aphrodite +
A Mighty Wind =
Minions =
The Mirror -
Misbehaviour =
Miss Americana =
Miss Sloane +
Mistress America +
The Motorcycle Diaries =
N
Napoleon Dynamite =
Neighbors -
Network +
New York Doll +
Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist =
Nightcrawler
9th Company +
Northern Soul +
Notes on a Scandal
Nowhere Boy +
O
Obvious Child +
On a Clear Day =
The Panic in Needle Park =
Parasite +
Partly Cloudy +
The Passion of the Christ -
Past Lives +
Paul =
Paul Weller: Studio 150 =
The Perks of Being a Wallflower +
The Personal History of David Copperfield +
Phantom Thread +
Phone Booth +
Pickle =
Pierrepoint (cinema) +
Pierrepoint (DVD) +
Pitch Perfect +
Pitch Perfect 2 =
Play It Again, Sam =
Pretty in Pink =
Pride =
The Princess and the Frog +
The Princess Bride =
The Producers =
Professor Marston and the Wonder Women =
The Program =
Project Nim +
Proof =
A Prophet (AKA Un prophète) +
Pumping Iron +
Punk's Not Dead +
The Purple Rose of Cairo +
Rush +
S
Saloon =
Saving Mr. Banks +
Saw =
Say Anything… +
A Scanner Darkly +
Scent of a Woman =
School Ties =
Scoop +
Scott Pilgrim vs. the World +
Sea of Love =
Searching +
Searching for Sugar Man
Secretary =
The Selfish Giant +
Senna +
Shadows and Fog =
Sicko +
Sideways =
The Silence of the Lambs +
Silent Running =
Silent Shakespeare =
Silver City =
Skyfall =
Sleeper =
Sleepless in Seattle =
Slumdog Millionaire =
Small Time Crooks =
The Social Network +
Some Kind of Wonderful +
Some Like It Hot =
Somersault +
Somers Town +
Source Code *
Still Alice +
The Stone Roses: Made of Stone *
The Stone Tape -
Strictly Ballroom =
Stronger +
Style Wars +
subUrbia =
Sunshine on Leith +
Superbad =
Super Size Me (cinema) =
Super Size Me (TV) =
Sweet and Lowdown =
Ted =
The Terminal =
Thank You for Smoking +
37 Uses for a Dead Sheep =
This Is England *
This Is Spinal Tap =
This Sporting Life =
Three Colours: Blue (AKA Trois couleurs: Bleu) +
Three Colours: Red (AKA Trois couleurs: Rouge) +
Three Colours: White (AKA Trois couleurs: Blanc) +
To All the Boys I've Loved Before =
To All the Boys: P.S. I Still Love You =
Trainwreck +
Trance =
Trucker +
True Grit (2010) +
True History of the Kelly Gang -
True Stories: Biggie and Tupac =
Tsotsi +
TT3D: Closer to the Edge (2D) +
20th Century Women
2001: A Space Odyssey *
U
Uncut Gems =
Under the Skin +
United 93 +
Untouchable (AKA Intouchables) +
Up (2D) *
Up in the Air +
W
Wag the Dog +
Waking Life +
Walk the Line -
Wallace & Gromit in The Curse of the Were-Rabbit +
WALL·E +
The War Room +
Wayne's World =
The Way Way Back +
We Are Marshall =
Wedding Crashers =
Weiner
Le Week-end +
What's Up, Tiger Lily? =
What We Did on Our Holiday =
When Harry Met Sally... *
When the Levees Broke: A Requiem in Four Acts +
When We Were Kings =
Whip It +
Whiplash +
Wide Sargasso Sea =
Winter's Bone =
World Trade Center -
X
X-Men =
Y
Yesterday =
Your Father's Murderer: A Letter to Zachary +
Your Sister's Sister +
You've Got Mail (TV) =
You've Got Mail (Amazon Video) =
You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger +
Z
Zelig =
Zombieland +
Zoolander =
Chinatown (1974) - ickleReview (cinema)
It's a hot summer in LA. Water levels are low. Private snoop Jake Gittes (Nicholson) is hired by a distressed wife to expose her husband, whom she insists is having an affair. It turns out he works for the city water board and that not everything is as it first seemed. A great script continually flashes "wrong way" signs, just after it has assured you that this was the diversion to get round the traffic jam. We see things from Gittes's perspective - we feel how he is cut out of the loop and lied to repeatedly by his clients.
There are some odd moments in this film, like when Faye Dunaway rests her head on the steering wheel of her car, accidentally tooting the horn: some odd laughs, that may have been outtakes that were left in, or deliberate jibes by Polanski.
Nugget: shows real affection for an old genre, in which Wilder and Welles used to excel - but arguably does it better. A pleasure to see it for the first time on the big screen, even if the print was ageing and the projectionist fiddled with the focus for the first fifteen minutes.
Friday, 12 November 2004
Fight Club (1999) - ickleReview (DVD)
The second rule of Right Club is: You do not talk about Fight Club.
The third rule of Fight Club is: You do not quote these lines.
(I'm sure those rules were created just to make the trailers sound cool; or to prevent spoilers. Hence, I won't talk about Fight Club and ruin the plot.)
It's a while since I've seen this. Movies like this (and Memento, The Usual Suspects, The Shawshank Redeption, The Sixth Sense) lose their impact on a second viewing. But it's still a stylish and well made film; and Brad Pitt is on form, even if he doesn't have to do much because his character is so cool already.
Edward Norton plays an office bum (like Neo in The Matrix, except not as gay) who is bullied by his boss, unhappy and insomniac. He goes to group therapy for testicular cancer so he can cry on Meat Loaf's bitch tits (contrary to reports, he was not wearing a fat suit: those were real). The plot has the appearance of being all joined up: "It all started when I met a girl called Marla Singer..."; but it's more like a blind person is playing dot-to-dot on a bumpy bus ride.
The best parts of this film are the little things: like the airline safety card that shows the passengers' true emotions during a sea-landing (panic); the line about making expensive soap from liposuction fat: "It was beautiful. We were selling rich women their own fat asses back to them"; or the bit when Norton says if he could fight any historic figure, he's fight Gandhi. On the whole, there's some great writing (most of it, I suspect, in Chuck Palahniuk's novel), like when a cancer patient gets up to talk about her experiences: "Chloe looked the way Meryl Streep's skeleton would look if you made it smile and walk around the party being extra nice to everybody."
Nugget: The fourth rule of Fight Club is: Shut up already!
Wednesday, 10 November 2004
The Corporation (2003) - ickleReview (cinema)
This is a well balanced film, with opinion from right-wing think-tankers, Nobel Prize-winning (hawk) economists, reformed conscience CEOs, Michael Moore, and Noam Chomsky. There's a hilarious scene from one of Moore's movies when he goes to sing Christmas carols - in true corporate spirit - in the foyer of a large tobacco company...with victims of throat cancer, who squawk along, holding a finger to the hole in their throat.
But it's not all end-of-the-world stuff. There are some uplifting citings of the people uprising in Bolivia to oppose the privitization of their city's water supply; of advocates for sustainable development; of smalltown American communities boycotting chain stores. We (or our lawyers did) gave birth to this monster; but we can also slay it like Beowulf.
Nugget: Not quite as engaging as Mark Achbar's 1992 film, Manufacturing Consent: Noam Chomsky and the Media, but still makes informative and at times entertaining and funny viewing.
Dumb fuck shopping
Sad Night Chorus of the Heart
Your hair drooping lilac feather
We hold press longer than longing
Soft felt palm of jacket back
The unspoken sorries of misunderstanding
Are crushed between beating breasts.
Friday, 5 November 2004
Finding Neverland (2004) - ickleReview (cinema)
There's a dizzingly amazing crane shot during the performance of the play, when the camera flies up from the stage and spins around the auditorium before finding Peter Llewelyn Davies (Freddie Highmore) in the audience. In an earlier garden scene, there's some clever editing to show Peter's internal psychology: he is the only one of the five playing a game of cowboys and indians who isn't using his imagination: shots of him are in the garden at home; from the others' perspective, they are on a cowboy movie set.
Nugget: avoids tweeness; sentimental, but not stickily.
Tuesday, 2 November 2004
Melinda and Melinda (2004) - ickleReview (cinema - London Film Festival)
The polar plots develop as two writers sketch out their opposing views by taking the same basic story and making it either tragic or comic. Melinda is a fuckup friend who walks in on a dinner party when her life is falling apart. Her Park Avenue princess friends hook her up with a guy and things - as they tend to do in Allen's worldview - get messy. The plots begin to converge at the end, demonstrating that when tragedy is taken to an extreme, it can seem comic.
Nugget: Allen admits that he just can't do Bergman by letting the laughs seep into the tragic plot by juxtaposition.
Old Wine in a New Skin
You stand there half-hunched
Over dust and ash and desk,
Laptop laid out, flopped back to the sky.
Dappled ashen dust screen,
Pockered keys, wires tripping on the floor.
Carpet covered in filing overspill,
Regular chaos in poetic form.
Books beline shelves on all sides,
Knowledge learned, loved, knocked back
Like a bottle and a half of red.
You look apologetic about this den,
This breeding ground of cursed spawn
Of serpents small, error's minions
Nashed up in the pores and breathing space
Of the housetop. What is here
But we may read in books –
And a great deal more too –
Without stirring our feet out of a warm study?
Paper monster, full and black as ink
Spot. Poems clean and polished
Are unearthed here, dug from the depths
Of soily gritty logos worms
Down a hole with beak, chasing juices
Like a morning bird.
After the rains, the dirt washed off,
The gems glisten on plain paper,
Clean not crinkle-bashed,
Panned and sifted, shifted
Above the stream.
Monday, 1 November 2004
Spac leg
Once I finished up with Tom, I walked down Abingdon Road to Jamie's house. Xon (which I later found out is pronounced "chon") answered the door. She took me upstairs to Jamie's study. He's a poet, published by Faber. His room was suitably lived in. It was amiably chaotic. My job was to help him transfer some files from his old, chugging laptop to his much newer Toshiba. It took us more than a couple of hours. As his desk was so cluttered, I set up my laptop on the floor to receive his files disk by disk on floppy. Then I burnt them all on to CD and copied them on to his new laptop.
Perhaps as a result of all my crouching, kneeling and sitting on the floor, my circulation was beginning to go. When I was sitting on the chair with my laptop on my lap, helping Xon to combine two jpegs into one, I began to get pins and needles in my left leg. I flexed it a little bit, but it didn't go away. When I got up to fetch something, my leg became totally spasticated. I almost fell over. I guess it was like having multiple sclerosis momentarily, or feeling unsteady on my feet like an old fogie. It was quite scary, but funny as well. It was like my leg was stuck in a bucket of gluey quicksand. I felt like Mr Soft from the Softmints advert: "Oh Mr Soft, why won't you tell me why the world in which you're living is so strange?" It went away, eventually, but it's still feeling a little tender a few hours after the event.
First première
Before the screening Bacon and co. were presented on stage. He said he was glad to be in London, a rare opportunity for him - which always means he doesn't want to be here. His blondie wife stood beside him, hands behind her halternecked back, and only spoke to say her dress was by a British designer. Like I care. But sadly, I know there will be many who were impressed. Then Bacon introduced a blinged up black guy, Damien Dash, whose fat hip-hop producer's cheque book had paid for the movie. Bacon schmoozed that he was wearing a suit designed by said same bling-merchant. Again, like I care. Again, some would have wowed.
Then the movie. Then the questions from a dumb-fuck suck-up sycophant-you-wanna-make-me-rant audience. "I just want to say, I thought your performances were all great...", "I'm from Philly ::Woo!:: and I'm so glad you shot the film there...". Fuck. Off.
I liked the film. I could care less for the event.
The Woodsman (2004) - ickleReview (cinema - London Film Festival première)
Vickie tries to uncover Walter's black secret. Meanwhile, he meets occasionally with his brother-in-law (Benjamin Bratt), his only contact with a family that has disowned him. Police Sgt. Lucas (Mos Def) drops by from time to time to harrass Walter, letting him know that he's under constant surveillance. We also see Walter in conversation with his therapist.
New director Nicole Kassell doesn't try to justify or condone child molestation, or explain the why's or the how's of its happenings. We sympathize with Walter's isolation, yet we cringe at his stupidity, following young girls in shopping malls and public parks. We don't understand his temptation. There is a marvellous and frightening scene on a park bench when Walter talks to an eleven-year-old girl (Hannah Pilkes), who rides the same bus as him and gets off at the park to go bird-watching.
The screenplay by Kassell and Steven Fechter is wonderfully poised. At times the characters' words shimmer in poetic simplicity: they talk of one thing, but may mean another. Closure is reached through a final monologue voice-over from the therapy sessions, but without any hint of Hollywood schmaltz. Pictures, rather than words convey meaning.
Nugget: a rare example of good writing and sensible, usually controlled acting. A stand-out performance by Hannah Pilkes.
For more on the London Film Festival première, see this post.